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Making my boyfriend realize money doesn't grow on trees?

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  • Making my boyfriend realize money doesn't grow on trees?


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Answer #1 | 05/01 2014 11:28
Get him to start listening to Dave Ramsey!
Answer #2 | 05/01 2014 12:09
Seriously please don't move in with him until this has been sorted out. If you do move in with him and it's not sorted, you are as much responsible for his debt as you and if you leave the accommodation with debt, the people you owe the money too will come after the easiest person. And that's you. He doesn't realise the true value of money and the cost of living and until he does, he won't be watching his spending money. My friend was in the same situation and decided to go ahead, thinking that once they were together he would see the light of the world. He didn't. He left to go back to mum and dad and she was left to pay off his debt on the house, bills etc. Don't take the risk. Please. KD
Answer #3 | 05/01 2014 12:02
Do not move in with him. First he he really love you he would be talking marriage and he's not. Secondly he's stupid with money put every bill in his name and pay no more than half. He not that crazy about you and his dreaming is about his truck not his life with you . He making no plan that's sensible . Don't move in with him until he on his own has a place outside of your money . The fact that he's not asking for marriage and his plans are all About t his truck are clear signs you just not his true love .
Answer #4 | 05/01 2014 11:48
Read the book Living Together with Benefits by Judy Shendlin. This book will outline alot of things you haven't even thought about when living with a person who doesn't respect money or where the money comes from. I read it, I highly recommend it. It can be had online from Amazon pretty cheap for paperback book. Get it and read it.
Answer #5 | 05/01 2014 13:03
Facts are facts dear. Doesn't mean that anyone is at fault or that there is even anything wrong with them. You want your boyfriend to be a thoughtful and responsible grown up with a self sustaining income and he simply isn't that person. Likely won't be for years yet. You want a lion and you've chosen a cub. Not the cub's fault he is not a lion! Neither of you make any where near the amount of money needed to rent a house and support yourselves. That is the fact of it. You're telling us that your combined sum of take home is less than $2,000 a month and you, in your own naivety, think you can rent a little house and make a home and pay your bills and enjoy your lives together on less than $2,000 a month. In 2014. With you not contributing, or even planning to contribute, a full half share. You want him to carry the fiscal load. According to your math, your boyfriend is broke already because his bills exceed his income. That's just real. In no way is he making enough money to up his expenditures... even if you were in charge. Which you are not. And there is no reason he should let you be. You've got unrealistic expectations going on here.
Answer #6 | 05/01 2014 13:32
You are crazy to combine your finances with his...you can't "get" him to understand anything...he'll either figure it out after he leaves home or not...he may figure it out and still not be financially responsible... It's BS for him to max out his card and claim that's to build credit...it's not necessary to max out anything to build credit and what he's doing is upping his debt so if he did need to borrow money he'd be seen as a higher risk than someone with less debt (especially since he doesn't make that much money)... If you can back out of the rental you should...otherwise, you risk messing up your credit by living with him and supposedly sharing expenses...he'll drag you down (financially) with him...
Answer #7 | 05/01 2014 23:58
Maybe moving in is not the best idea, but if you do choose to follow through then make an outline and if he refuses to comply then make an outline that works for both of you together or separately. You guys could share the costs or have your own sets of costs. It's risky and it either can or can't work out, have an honest conversation and bring up your fears and see where to go from there, but do not let money dictate the relationship, it can go south quickly. Be realistic not idealistic, it's one thing to live at parents and another to live independently. it's going to be a learning process in all aspects financial, emotional, traditionally, and so on. You can also have a roommate to have that extra income in case of emergency if it's a possibility.
Answer #8 | 05/01 2014 21:56
You can't make people understand things like that. Money problems are the #1 cause of divorce. You aren't even married yet, and you already have problems.
Answer #9 | 05/01 2014 16:35
YOU are the one not realizing a few things here. You are complaining about the fact that he doesn't seem to realize that once you move in together his bad spending habits will affect the two of you - yet you're still prepared to move in with someone you already know has no common sense when it comes to finances. What is wrong with you? Why are stupid enough to walk into disaster with your eyes wide open? If you go ahead and move in with him, in another year you'll be on here whining about how deep you are in debt and how you have no money to pay your bills.
Answer #10 | 05/01 2014 14:08
You could ask him to keep a zero balance on that card for the next couple of years, leave it at his parents' so he doesn't use it -- until he sees what sort of financial situation the two of you are in while living together. Maybe he would agree to that? I was never that great with money either... i finally started watching my pennies 15 years ago. Considering i'm 56, it took me a while to figure it all out. take care!!

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