Help my husband and kids treat me like a slave!?

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  • Help my husband and kids treat me like a slave!?


Answer #1 | 28/12 2013 21:17
Put your foot down and make every one pitch in or eliminate things such as, allowance, electronics, etc, for the kids. Husband... Well eliminate bedroom time.
Positive: 100 %
Answer #2 | 28/12 2013 21:05
You need to arrange to take a holiday or stay with a friend or relative for a few weeks so they have to look after themselves. You then tell them to clean up after themselves or you're leaving.
Positive: 100 %
Answer #3 | 28/12 2013 21:16
First it is completely disrespectful to call yourself a slave! You could walk out the door whenever you please. Are there some things your husband and children enjoy? CUT IT OFF! Food, TV, shoes, cash flow, computer. No help no perks!
Positive: 100 %
Answer #4 | 28/12 2013 21:21
"I have also tried to let all the dishes pile up and my husband gets depressed and so I go do it all!" There's your mistake! LET him get depressed. That's HIS issue to own. And after he works through his depression and gets the dishes done like an adult, give him a big hug and a kiss and a huge thank you and maybe even a nice evening in bed! (Husband training 101.) You're letting your guilt do you in. You have a choice: guilt or anger. You'll have to live with one or the other. Better to live with a little guilt than to be used like a doormat. As for the kids: I bet they'll fall in line once dad falls in line. (If HE has to clean up the pee you'd better believe he'll be having them help with the messes.) Take care. Edit: Liz's answer is good, too!
Positive: 100 %
Answer #5 | 28/12 2013 21:12
The best place to start is not by asking them to clean up after a meal. I would tell them you expect them to MAKE the meal. Then you can clean up after them, as long as the mess is reasonable. No meal, no cleanup. But everyone, (including you) would like to know in advance when something is expected of them, so don't surprise them with a responsibility and expect them to respond well. Perhaps you are a perfectionist and have preferred to to the work yourself instead of risking a substandard job. If so, relax on that and learn to encourage rather than criticize. "Nice job on the sink there! I do notice the area behind the toilet could use a better scrub, but I am so glad for your help. How about getting that and calling me back for a second look?" In our house, we have had house meetings where I've opened up discussion on the duties that need to be done. I tell the kids (kindly) we have some areas we need to work on together and get them to help divide the work. When this is done AWAY from the heat of the moment you often get better results. We also have 2-hour workdays in the yard during heavy yard work seasons and find a time when most or all the kids will be available to work HARD for that period of time. Whatever gets done during that time determines whether or not another work day is needed, but we don't go overtime. Kids need to have an end to their work, too. If you respect your kids' feelings by scheduling their work, you may find them more responsive. And don't forget to thank them. It means as much to them as it does to you. Hope this helps!
Positive: 75 %
Answer #6 | 28/12 2013 21:07
Fvck 'em. I'd leave.
Answer #7 | 28/12 2013 21:04
You don't say how old your chidren are. You're going to have to take a stand and stop cleaning up after them no matter how crazy the mess makes you. Do only what makes your life your laundry, wash your dishes and put them someplace for you to use next time, cook for yourself, etc.

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